My Experiences With Anorexia
In the past I have struggled with Anorexia Nervosa but I am well now, a healthy weight and I'm happy and comfortable in my body. There are other eating disorders such as bulimia, binge-eating disorder and EDNOS and night eating syndrome too etc, however, it is anorexia I was diagnosed with.
Body image and expectations on how you should look and eat are plastered everywhere these days. You constantly see the perfect models with their slim figures and flat tums. There is a lot of pressure to be slim (or from my experience). In the past I have been called fat on social media and in real life too which affected me hugely. Young people and adults too are sucked into the idea that you need to be "thin" and toned because this is what all models look like.
I hope for the future society will learn to love their bodies the way they are, whether you're curvy or slim, it's none of anyone else's business to say what you should and shouldn't eat. Loving yourself can be difficult and eventually, after 3 years, I love my body and I look after it. We are now beginning to use plus size models in magazines and adverts which is great because the stigma that all models are thin is completely unrealistic. I don't believe in body shaming, including "fat" shaming and "thin" shaming. Fat and thin are not bad words and nothing to be ashamed of, we are built the way we are built and that's okay.
People develop eating disorders for many different reasons and I found that for myself it was all about control. I felt so out of control of my life that the only way I could control it was by restricting my food intake and body checking. Not everyone experiences the same symptoms and eating disorders are very complex. If you're struggling with an eating disorder and trying to recover then don't feel put off because it takes time. It took me three years and for others it could take less or more but it's all about the individual.
To help recover from my eating disorder I did lots of body image therapy which at first I hated, but looking back on it, it actually helped me. I had low self-esteem too which fed into my eating disorder. Another therapy useful for treating eating disorders is CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). It is used to help challenge negative thoughts regarding body image, it could also include keeping a diary and noticing changes in your life and the positive and negative emotions regarding their body. It helps find the trigger and notice the early warning signs which is crucial.
The key factor here is not to give up hope. Recovery is not linear and it takes time so if you think you're not progressing then just keep at it and try to notice the small improvements you make. It's not always a quick fix and could take years, just remember you're not alone and you can always contact someone if you need help such as b-eat: 0300 123 3355 and Samaritans: 0121 666 6644
"And i said to my body softly, 'i want to be your friend,' and it took a long deep breath and replied 'i have been waiting my whole life for this.'"
